Biblical meaning of dreaming about your ex

For a lot of people seeing the image of a snake or a dragon, or even the devil in their dreams is enough to give them cold sweats. Those types of images are enough to wake them up, panting and short of breath.

Well, for a lot of us, the image of our ex-girlfriends, ex-boyfriends, or ex-wives and ex-husbands has the same effect. If you’ve had that kind of nighttime vision, and you are a Bible-believing Christian, this post gets deep into the biblical meaning of dreaming about your ex.

The general meaning of dreaming about your ex relationships

Whether long-term relationships or shorter-term emotional involvement, the biblical meaning of our past relationships tend to fall within a narrow range of interpretations.

First of all, these dreams indicate that your mind is focused on old patterns of living and thinking. You’re looking over your shoulder to the past. Either you are comparing your current relationships in your emotional life to the relationships that you have enjoyed in the past.

This is very similar to Lot’s wife, taking one last look at Sodom as they fled for their lives. There’s just something about the old pattern that keeps drawing you back. Growing from this theme is the sub-theme of unresolved issues.

Let’s face it, people are fallen and flawed. They are imperfect, just as you are imperfect. There will always be a point in your relationship that you wish you had some more clarity or even some closure on. If the bigger these unresolved issues may be, the stronger you’re longing to revisit them to finally move on.

This, of course, can involve feelings of shame, guilt, or even unresolved attraction. A lot of people fall in love with certain types of individuals, not because they love the person themselves. Instead, they either fall in love with the idea of being in love or they have all these misconceptions about that type of person.

When we have this secret attraction, to “the bad girl” or “the bad boy” archetype, we entertain our secret wishes. These are guilty pleasures that we don’t readily admit to. Another key theme in the biblical meaning of dreaming about your ex involves past emotional states.

Let’s face it, growing up is very hard. Most people would rather not do it. Why? The mark of adulthood is learning how to sacrifice. As the apostle Paul writes in First Corinthians chapter 13: When I was a child, I spoke and acted like a child. Now that I’m a man I put away all childish things.

That may seem pretty straightforward. It might even give one the impression that there’s this dividing line between adulthood and mental and emotional infancy. If only that were true. Because part of the reason why our relationships are as complicated, exciting, and challenging as they are, is the fact that different people mature at different rates.

I know it’s kind of uncomfortable to admit, but there’s still a part of you that is still a little child and wants to remain that way. When you think back to your past relationship through your dreams, you are really examining your attitude towards maturing.

This has little to do with the relationship instead of acting as some sort of symbol for your readiness and willingness to finally mature. Because you’re going to have to leave a lot of stuff in the past. You’re going to have to learn how to sacrifice.

The world is going to change quite a bit. And it’s no surprise that the final general meaning of dreaming about your ex involves negative feelings. There’s a part of you that stubbornly refuses to move on, and wants to remain where they are.

Maybe it’s because you feel that you can wait for the world to get its act together. Maybe you’re even thinking that people owe you something, whatever the case may be, you’re just putting off that point in your life where you will have to decide whether you will embrace a life of sacrifice.

Whether you are a Christian or not, adulthood means acceptance of a life of sacrifice. Now, this varies some people are able to sacrifice quite a bit, others not so much. But you still have to make that choice.

What does dreaming of your ex-boyfriend mean?

If you’re a female, or, a gay male, and you’re dreaming about your ex-boyfriend, this could symbolize unfinished business or a past relationship that still needs closure. In many cases, it’s not really the person that you miss. Instead, you long for who you were at that time in your life.

Please understand that these are two totally different things. But unfortunately, people equate certain people from their past with a sense of closure with who they were, at that point in their lives. If you’re able to separate the two, you’ll finally be able to get that closure that you’ve been yearning for all these years.

Why? It’s all in your head. It’s not in the hands of your ex-boyfriend. He has moved on. It’s time for you to gain closure in your head and understand that you’re no longer that person in that past relationship.

You have matured, you’ve seen new things, you’ve gone through new things.
Let those experiences reshape you. Take ownership of them. No need to hide from them. No need to think that your past relationships are “the best or better” than your current ones. You’re just playing games with yourself because you are no longer the same person.

What does dreaming of past relationships mean?

If you’re generally thinking of past relationships and your dream focuses on different episodes of your past relationships, you are simply projecting unresolved emotional issues you’re having today.

In other words, when you think of the past and you are overcome by some sort of positive or pleasant sensation, you’re simply just escaping from the responsibility of dealing with your frustrations, unhappiness, and conflicts today. You have to understand that those relationships are long gone.

Those people are different, and you are a different person back then. They’re different now. In fact, in many cases, you might not even recognize them emotionally. You can recognize them physically. But that’s pretty much emotionally and personality-wise they have moved on, they have changed.

You should also change. Because the more you look at the past as a place of refuge or even escape from having to deal with anger, resentment, sadness, abandonment, and other unresolved issues today, the longer you put off your emotional maturity. You’re not doing yourself any favors. The past is never as awesome as you imagined it to be nor is the future as scary as you fear it to be.

What does dreaming of your ex-girlfriend mean?

If you’re a guy or a lesbian female who was dreaming about your ex-girlfriend, this indicates that you have a problem with setting down new routes. There’s just something about what lies ahead in your life today, that throws you off. Sure, you can look to your past and see that you are an otherwise capable person.

You can maintain a relationship, you can meet new people, and you can get things done. But none of that past performance gives you the assurance you need to boldly go forward. You keep looking over your shoulder.

The Bible teaches that one of the key elements of trust is to let go of your past. Indeed, when Jesus talks about the Kingdom of God, he used the analogy of somebody seeing a great treasure in a field. And after discovering that treasure, he goes on to sell everything he owns so he could buy that plot of land where the treasure is.
Jesus was highlighting the power of trust. Because when you have found the truth, you must trust it enough to let go of your past. This is not a simple exercise, because it takes a lot of courage to finally turn away from the past. Basically, your past is dead to you.

When you’re dreaming of your ex-girlfriend, your subconscious is telling you that you have to trust who you are right now because there are many different opportunities here. I’m not talking about relationships per se. I’m talking about who you are and the path that you are going to follow.

And if you keep thinking about the past, and you’re basically giving yourself excuse after excuse not to grow up, you’ll have to trust yourself enough to make the necessary sacrifices to keep pushing forward.

Unfortunately, a lot of people are afraid of failure. And this is completely natural. But the truth is, if you don’t make that move, you’re already failing.

The worst form of failure is not trying and missing the mark. The worst form of failure and defeat is when you think back and regret the times you didn’t even try.

What does dreaming of past relationship mistakes mean?

When the mental camera of your dream focuses on the big blowups and the big drama of your past relationships, please understand that this dream imagery has little to do with that person from your past. Instead, your subconscious is telling you that you tend to dwell on minor points that at the end of the day don’t really mean all that much.

Put in another way you major in the minors. You sweat all the small details that you lose sight of the big picture and it’s why you are so disoriented, frustrated, and feeling powerless. It’s as if your life is spiraling beautifully in front of you but there is this distinct danger that it’s going to just spiral out of control, there’s really nothing you can do about it.

When you focus on past relationship mistakes in your dream, your subconscious is telling you, that you have to know how to prioritize. Who are you right now? Who do you want to be? What are your most important values? Are you living them out? Are they reflected in what you choose to do and how you carry yourself?

If not, then you’re just a liar among many other liars. You’re just an actor. So stop obsessing about past mistakes. Instead, focus on where you are now and start living the kind of life you want for yourself now.

What does dreaming of an abusive ex mean?

Unfortunately, none of us are immune from being in a relationship with a toxic person. Why? Sometimes were toxic too. And what makes this type of dream imagery so confusing is that you wouldn’t have fallen in love with that person if all they did was abuse you.

In fact, you wouldn’t even be attracted to them. Unless you have some sort of normal psychology or recovering from some sort of emotional trauma dealt with by your parents. But for normal people, we are drawn to abuse.

And when your mental camera in your dream focuses on the blowups, the verbal abuse, or even the physical punishment, your subconscious is telling you that you run the risk of constantly blaming other people for your personal failings and lack of courage.

It’s very convenient to point the finger at our parents, or our first boss, or a group of bullies in school, who somehow some way had a negative effect on our personal development. While it’s true, that there may have been some sort of abuse in the past, at the end of the day, you are responsible for your life right now.

Not those people. They have moved on, they’ve changed. But you refuse to change. Why? It’s so easy to blame what’s going on and how warped your mindset and your decisions have become, because of some sort of past trauma.

They are useful to you, so you can’t let them go. But the problem is, the more you hang on to that type of thinking, the more you refuse to take responsibility for your life right here, right now. The reality is, that your mindset is the cause and your life is the effect.

If you are in any way, unhappy, you only have yourself to blame because you refuse to take responsibility. Let them go. Forgive them. If you are a practicing Christian, or even if you believe in God, forgive them. Why? Forgiveness is a key characteristic of a higher being. And if you believe in that higher being, you should forgive.

Jesus had a parable about this where a king was owed a lot of money by one of his stewards. So the king called in the store and said, “I’m gonna throw you in jail because you owe me so much money”. And that steward says, “Give me some more time I’m going to pay it all back”.

So the king forgave him. He was so touched by his two words plea. Instead of just giving the guy an extension, the king wiped out the debt. What did a steward do right after his debt was forgiven?

He ran into somebody who owed him a very tiny fraction of what he owed the king. The steward grabbed the guy and said, “Where’s my money?” And the guy said, “Please, I’ll pay you just give me some time.”

The steward didn’t want to hear any of it and had the guy thrown in jail. When the king heard about this, he condemned the steward and revoked his debt forgiveness.

This parable highlights the fact that we all must practice mercy if we want the universe to be merciful to us. It is a form of hypocrisy. To be dependent on God’s grace, while at the same time withholding that grace, tenderness, mercy, and kindness to others who may owe us.

We all have fallen short. And that’s why we need to be forgiven. If you agree with that, then you can forgive those who abused you, because at the end of the day that forgiveness is not for them. In many cases, they don’t even care.

Those bullies when you were a kid who humiliated you, you think they care? They moved on. They’ve bigger fish to fry. Your forgiveness means the world to you, though.

Forgive them, because this is the best way for you to forgive yourself, and then you can move on. But if you keep dreaming of your abusive acts, or those instances of abuse, you’re hanging on to some sort of emotional lifeline that may bring temporary emotional relief. But it’s harming you, over the long haul. How? It’s preventing you from growing up.

What is dreaming about your first love mean?

This is a very dangerous kind of dream. Because if you are currently in a relationship, you are comparing the ideal emotional state you should be in with what you’re feeling now. This is so unfair. Why? People are not cartoons.

Whenever you think about ideal relationships, you are turning people into cartoons. You’re dealing with unrealistic standards because they are fantasies. If you are really honest with yourself, and you think about your first love, it’s never as smooth and sweet and happy as you imagined it to be now.

In most cases, it’s probably awkward and embarrassing at some point. But you can be counted on to overlook those realities and say you just focus on how that person made you feel. Focus on the sense of discovery of this part of you that seems so new.

Well, the problem is that’s your first love. You don’t know what it’s like to have your heart broken yet. You don’t know about the deep, dark corners of the human heart yet. You don’t even know yourself all that much yet.

So how is it fair to compare your first love with your love life now? It’s not fair at all. In fact, once again, you are the one who is being disadvantaged. You’re the one who is suffering when you make these unfair comparisons.

Your subconscious is telling you to let go of unrealistic standards and deal with people and accept your relationship based on what they are. Now, does this mean that you’re going to settle for mediocrity? Does this mean that you’re going to turn a blind eye to abuse or just bad treatment? Of course not.

What this does mean is that you’re going to have to live in the present. And you cannot use this unrealistic measuring stick or standard for your relationships because you’re basing it on something that doesn’t exist.

In most cases, you’re probably just glorified a lot of the details in reality. Our first love is never as shiny, fulfilling, and gratifying as we imagine it to be.

What does it mean to dream about your recent ex?

The biblical dream meaning of a recent relationship is that you have a tough time letting go. Again, this does not necessarily have to involve your feelings about that person. Instead, it’s about your relationship to change in general.

It would be very helpful for you to read the part of the Bible when King David was mourning the death of his child. For several days, he was miserable. But once the final day came, he put all that aside. He took a bath and cut his hair, and it seemed like he was a new person. The same goes for you. It’s perfectly okay to mourn relationships that didn’t work out.

A lot of people have a tough time finding the right person because they don’t properly mourn their failed relationships. They have to go through that process so they can clear out their emotions, they can regain their perspective and can love again. But this time, love in a smarter way.

This is especially true for guys. You have to give yourself that time. This also applies more importantly to how you deal with change. A lot of people fail because they insist on failing slowly.

They’re telling themselves okay, “I’m just going to stop here and wait for somebody else to come through and save me”. Do things really ever work out that way?

Of course not. Resolve to fail quickly. Give it all you’ve got. But see the results immediately so you can learn from them and make the next move. And if it doesn’t work out, learn a lesson from there and take the next move. And you keep repeating this until you achieve success consistently.

What does dreaming about an ex that dumped you mean?

People have a tough time with rejection. And when our dreams are focused on the times that we are either being dumped or our good times with a person that eventually dumped us, our subconscious is trying to communicate to us.

Key points regarding our rejection coping mechanism. You have to be prepared for rejection. It’s a part of life. Even if somebody says to you that you’re perfect and things were go seemingly, and then something happens and things aren’t perfect anymore.

That is a possibility and be prepared for that. This doesn’t just involve learning how to let go. It also involves learning how to learn from your experiences. Because ultimately dreaming about an ex that dumped you has little to do with your past relationship with that person.

Instead, it has everything to do with how you deal with unpleasant changes. Believe it or not, a lot of the big opportunities in your life are often disguised as rejection, humiliation, shame, and defeat.

Unfortunately, you’re unable to unpack the opportunity because you’re just so turned off by the container. You run away from shame, humiliation, and other forms of emotional pain. But the truth is you have to go through them and learn from them.

In many cases, that itself is the opportunity. It’s an important stepping stone because people who have developed a thick emotional skin are able to keep making moves. To keep taking risks and are eventually able to position themselves where they reap a windfall.

That’s how you grow. Growth cannot be found going back. Growth cannot be found in the past or in the darkness.

What is dreaming of an ex that wants you back mean?

If you dream that your ex-boyfriend or girlfriend or ex-husband or wife is pleading with you to come back to them, your subconscious is trying to communicate with you about your tendency for wishful thinking. A lot of adults have this interesting habit where they daydream about really weird possibilities in the future.

I’m talking about improbable events. They get all emotionally caught up in what could have been, what if this happened? What if that happened? But they lose sight of one important thing. They become blind to what they need to do right here right now.

If you’re unaware that this is happening to you, you’re going to waste your life. Seriously, I’m not overstating this, I’m not being overly dramatic, this is real. Why? You’re not handling your business right here, right now. You’re supposed to build.

According to the parable of the talents in the Bible: God gave you a certain amount of potential. It is your responsibility to grow that. So if you’re given five talents, God expects you to make that grow, ideally, should double it.

As Jesus said, “To those who have been given a lot more will be given”. So focus on what’s in front of you. Stop deluding yourself, with daydreams. Stop getting emotionally anesthetized by transporting yourself mentally to a different place with a different reality.

You have to deal with the reality that is in front of you. That’s how you overcome. That’s how you build the kind of life you want for yourself. Unfortunately, too many adults engage in what-if scenarios and they waste a lot of their time. I’m talking about a tragedy.

What does dreaming about fighting an ex mean?

If the main focus of your dream involves a violent, loud, or even some sort of physical assault involving your ex, this can indicate a tough time critiquing yourself. It’s so easy to point the finger at people that we think caused us harm. And that’s why we turned out the way we did.

But if you do that, and if you do the math, and figure out the logic, you’re just fooling yourself. Why? Who you are right now is your choice. It’s not the results of what somebody else did to you, you chose to respond a certain way.

The good news is you can choose to respond in a different way. You have to shatter this addiction to blame. You may be saying to her, “Well, I’m just explaining why it turned out the way I did”. Are you sure you’re just explaining? Or are you making excuses?

Because you can be whoever you want to be. I know that a lot of people laugh at that. And that is part of their mental oppression. They’re still hooked on this idea that its other people that caused them to be who they are. No. You are who you are because you chose to be.

There are a lot of people who grew up with the same amount of abuse, the same amount of frustration and they turned out well. They’re very effective. People look up to them, they make things happen. They don’t engage in the same excuses you do.

So when you see yourself arguing or even being physically assaulted, or you assaulting your ex, your subconscious is telling you to cut it out. You’re having a tough time critiquing yourself. You’re playing all sorts of games on yourself. Stop it.

If the critique is accurate, accept it. Yes, we fail. Yes, we screw up. Yes, we hurt other people. Yes, we hurt ourselves. Don’t let it be a blow to your ego.

Understand that this is the price you need to pay for you to grow up. All of us have to. And just because you hang out with people who refuse to grow up doesn’t absolve you of the responsibility to mature.

What is dreaming about having kids with your ex mean?

If your dream focuses on the alternative reality of you having children with your ex, this indicates that you feel your ex is responsible for how your life turned out.

For advice on how to deal with this interpretation, just read the section above. It’s not much different.

You’re thinking that your interaction with that person in the past has given birth to your life now. You are the kid, your life is the offspring. I hope you can see what’s wrong with this picture.

What does it mean to dream about a toxic ex-relationship?

If the primary focus of your dream involves the toxic nature of your relationship, this can be an example of projection. You are a toxic person at some level or other. Let’s admit it. I know I am, at some points. Everybody is.

But the more you deny it, the stronger that side of you becomes because it’s in the shadow. It operates behind your waking consciousness. You refuse to legitimize it, you refuse to even acknowledge it. Well, you have to acknowledge it.

Otherwise, you will justify your own toxic attitudes, words, and examples to others by talking about how your ex or how your past was so toxic. This is a cap out. All it is is just an elaborate show to tell the world that you refuse to grow up.

So what if your ex was toxic? We’re talking about who you are right now. Take responsibility for your own toxicity. Stop passing the buck.

What is dreaming of having sex with a toxic ex mean?

A lot of people view sex as a symbol of creativity. It indicates a creative gateway to a sense of intimacy. What are you looking for when you’re intimate with somebody? At the end of the day you’re looking for oneness, you’re looking to feel that you’re home, that you were fully accepted.

There’s no explanation needed, for why you are the way you are. It’s as if you arrived at a place and a time where you are just fully unified and accepted and you belong.

Physical sex is a gateway to this in the same way as emotional communion or spiritual intertwining. But these are all analogs. What your subconscious is trying to communicate to you is that you cannot find that sense of belonging in the past.

No amount of idealizing the past is going to help you resolve your need for making a home now. This is something that nobody can give you. Because you have to first be intimate with yourself emotionally and spiritually for you to even have that kind of love and respect to give to others. After all, you can only give what you have.

Seeing yourself having sex with your ex in your dream indicates a deep and profound spiritual poverty. You’ve been neglecting your spiritual life that’s why this intimacy you crave can only be visualized in the cheapest and most vulgar form. Know which is which.

What is dreaming about the annoying habits of your ex mean?

This dream imagery indicates that you are repressing your fears. It is a sign that you don’t want to speak up regarding your relationships now. So you focus on something that was annoying in the past because you feel you have some control over it.

At the very least you have some sense of comfort because it’s the past, and your ex is no longer with you. But once again, you’re trying to absolve yourself of the responsibility of resolving such annoyances and frustrations in the here and now.

Maybe you’re afraid that your current partner will eventually be as toxic as your ex. Maybe you’re afraid that you’re constantly doing something or deciding things in such a way that you bring out the worst in people.

Well, resolving those fears doesn’t involve going into the past. This is something that you need to take care of today. So stop being afraid, and start communicating clearly and sincerely.

What does it mean when you dream of saving your endangered ex?

This is a classic set of symbols, that indicates that you know that there are issues with your past. Again, this does not have anything to do with your past relationship. But you also understand that you are the only person that can set your life apart.

This is a very positive dream. Because when you take the initiative to save somebody in your dream, you are acknowledging, embracing, and celebrating the reality that you are in control of your life and nobody else. This is a good sign.

So focus on how you saved your ex. Because it’s not about your ex at the end of the day. It’s all about your ability to step up and be an adult emotionally and spiritually.

What does it mean to dream of an ex that’s trying to kill you?

When your focus is on a toxic relationship that ends with some sort of attempted murder, your subconscious is trying to reach out to you regarding your toxic self-confidence. A lot of people overcompensate for a deep and profound sense of self-doubt by going on the deep end when it comes to confidence.

You feel that if you can fool the world into thinking that you will be confident, that’s wrong. You have to be confident in reality first, and that’s not going to happen unless and until you accept yourself flaws and all. Start there. Start with self-acceptance.

What does it mean to dream of killing your ex?

When you see yourself killing your ex in a wide variety of ways, it indicates that you have unresolved emotional focusing problems. You tend to obsess about things, you tend to blow things out of proportion. This is manifesting itself in a very violent and often gross way when you see yourself killing your ex.

And the more graphic the murderer imagery, the deeper your problem. You should seek professional help, but not necessarily from a psychiatrist. Start with a pastor or your parish priest. If you’re Catholic, confession, or if you’re a Christian, bible counseling.

Whatever the case may be, your prayer life needs to be at the center. Please understand that the only real source of deep abiding peaceful intimacy in this world is prayer. Because when you pray you to become alone with God. Claim that privilege.

What does it mean to dream about your ex’s family?

When you dream that you’re going on a vacation with your ex around or when your ex is absent, your mind is talking about what could have been. The life you could have enjoyed if you had made different decisions in the past.

To some extent, this such dream imagery can shine a spotlight on to things that you need to resolve today. But if they can also be toxic. Why? Again, you’re holding yourself up to an impossible standard or you’re hanging on to memories that simply weren’t there.

You’re just making this up. You’re just over idealizing the life that you had with your ex. At the very least, this is a call to move on and be real. At the very worst, this is a plea for help, because you are slowly being drawn to living in the past. Let me remind you that’s not a good coping strategy, not by a long shot.

What does it mean to fight with an ex in your dream?

If the focus of your dream involves you fighting physically or verbally with your ex, this involves your need to be more honest. A lot of people have passive-aggressive. They go along to get along. They don’t want to be completely themselves or say what they’re thinking, because they don’t want to drive people away.

Fair enough. But you need to do that. Why? Iron sharpens iron. Real relationships are based on conflicts that were overcome. They’re not based on conflicts that were avoided.

Because if you’re just avoiding one conflict with yourself, as well as with the people you love in this world, you’re not growing, and they also definitely don’t get to grow.

I’m not saying that you should pick a fight at every opportunity that you can find. But what I am saying is that a little bit of authenticity, sincerity, and candidness do go a long way when it comes to relationship maturity.

What does it mean to be pregnant from an ex in your dream?

If you’re pregnant, by your ex, this indicates that there was some sort of idea or some sort of learning experience in the past that you need to cultivate today because it can lead to amazing opportunities. Believe it or not, sometimes our exes push us to become better versions of ourselves.

In many cases, a lot of people who really love us have to hurt us emotionally by rejecting us and pushing us out because they know that we’re capable of so much more. In other words, they really love us that’s why they have to let us go. That does happen.

To recognize this. And oftentimes this can take the form of a dream image of you being pregnant by your ex. Focus on the lesson that you learned because you can give birth to the kind of life that you thought you would never live.

What does it mean to dream of being close to an ex?

If you see yourself being sexually, physically, emotionally, or spiritually close to your ex in your dream this indicates that you are slipping into an unrealistic way of dealing with your present reality. Please understand that the way to life is not back to the cave but forward into the light into the dirt, the mud, and to sin itself.

Because when you refuse to fail, eventually failure will overcome you. Life is full of the risk of sin but we need to keep living. The good news is God’s grace and mercy are always free.

What does it mean to dream of stealing from an ex?

This indicates that you are beginning to wake up and you’re trying to steal or chip away a lot of the old ideas you may have heard from your past relationships and past childhood trauma to finally break free and create your own emotional and spiritual reality in the here and now.

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